


Mal

by bashfulrose



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: M/M, Multi, Tokyo Ghoul: re, brokentsukiyama, im so sorry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-02-16
Updated: 2015-02-21
Packaged: 2018-03-13 08:45:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 8
Words: 10,120
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3375146
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bashfulrose/pseuds/bashfulrose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Shuu was in high school, he used to be an escort for his father's rich associates. His father is somewhat grateful that this depressed Shuu does whatever he asks without complaint. These new gentlemen are different; they're Doves.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Capture

**Author's Note:**

> written for the kink meme
> 
> Tsukiyama/Any, prostitution, rape, non/con
> 
> Tsukiyama's dad pimps him out to his rich associates. They never try anything really... he's more like a escort of sorts, he has to go out with them and entertain them with conversation and the like.   
> Shuu doesn't suspect a thing, he just thinks his dad wants him to know these gentlemen for future alliances, and for everyone to feel envy of his perfect child.
> 
> Until one day something goes wrong. What could it be?
> 
> *The "date" tries to drug Shuu to rape him.  
> *The "date" discovers that Shuu is a ghoul and blackmails him.  
> *The "date" is an investigator of the CCG.

 

He used to do this. He shouldn't worry about anything going wrong.

 

He used to be so... confident, self-assured. But, Kaneki's death did take a toll on him. Kanae helps him find a suit. It a plain, boring black one with absolutely no designs. The stark white shirt looks too close to Shuu's skin color.

 

He hasn't been outside in a while...

 

“Kanae,” Shuu says, lifting two ties. One's purple. The other is red. “Which do you think I should wear to the dinner party?” He cannot actually eat anything there. But... his father needs his help. This is chance to redeem yourself in his father's eyes.

 

“I think the purple one looks nice, Shuu-sama,” says Kanae, taking the tie from you. He ties it. “There...”

 

He looks in the long mirror. The suit is a bit big; Shuu hasn't hunted in a while. He smoothes the suit. “I guess I'll be off then,” he says.

 

His eyes are still red and puffy from his tears, but... he can't afford to disappoint his father again. He cannot be so... useless to the Tsukiyama name.

 

 

Shuu's throat constricts.

 

Why didn't his father tell him that they would be dining with the CCG? He can't forgive them for... for killing his ultimate meal. His ultimate obsession! _Le pauvre_ Kaneki.

 

He sits to the right of his father. His father smiles with ease and chats. Shuu swallows the food whole, not really chewing. It tastes disgusting. He can't make a face. He can't upset the well-dressed gentlemen that his father wants to make an impression on.

 

“Tsukiyama-sama,” says one Dove. “Is this your son?”

 

“Oh, yes,” says his father, voice lacking emotion. “This is Shuu.” He pats Shuu's back and almost knocks him into the Dove.

 

“Nice to meet you, Shuu-kun,” he says. More Doves greet him.

 

They're very tall men, hair slicked back. Their eyes are hard. Well... they are experienced ghoul exterminators, but he had expected... friendlier men.

 

He continues sipping at the slightly sweet coffee, making polite conversation. Shuu's head pounds. He holds a cool hand to his forehead. Does he have a fever? This would be a terrible time to be sick.

 

Shuu makes eye contact with his father. His father... his eyes... they're so... cold?

 

“You'll make us proud, son,” his father says to him as Shuu blacks out.

 

 

He wakes up on the floor of a terribly tiny and dirty room.

 

What the hell was in his drink?

 

Shuu struggles to get up and collapses, landing awkwardly on his hip. It  _hurts._ The pain blossoms. Why is he so weak?

 

He takes account of himself.

 

He's still wearing his suit, but it's wrinkled and stained. On his neck is a  _collar_ . Shuu tugs at it, trying to use his ghoulish strength. It doesn't come off. Instead, an electric jolt shoots through his body. He yelps in alarm.

 

Now, he breaks out into a cold sweat.

 

His kagune! He could use that to break out. Shuu focuses, but the RC cells don't flow out of his body to create the drill-like organ... His eyes didn't even change. Shuu breathes through his mouth. In, out, in, out. He cannot afford to panic.

 

He thinks of the words his father told him before blacking out...

 

Was this whole thing a set up?

 

Did his own father sell him out to the CCG?

 

For what...?

 

He sniffs loudly. Shuu can't cry... They'll only hurt him more and that's exactly what he's afraid of...

 

The door slides open and in walks the Dove that had greeted him at the dinner party. He is tall, imposingly so. Maybe Banjoi's height. His hair is black and his face is severe. Shuu can't run or fight.

 

“Good morning, Shuu-kun,” he says. His voice is so cheerful... “Now, you must be wondering why you are here.”

 

He doesn't dignify that with a response.

 

“Oh... defiant, are we? It's okay. That will be taken care of,” says the man. “Now, I didn't get to introduce myself before. I am Special Investigator, Motoori Yasuo. You'll be calling me Motoori-san... or perhaps Motoori-sama?” His smile is cruel. There are two more men behind him, holding briefcases. Shuu knows what's inside of them...

 

“Still no talking, huh? That's fine. Anyway, you are to be kept by the CCG as per agreement drawn up by your father and our heads. As a ghoul, expect to be experimented on. You'll be kept alive, of course. But... will you want to be alive is a good question,” says Motoori.

 

“What agreement?” he hisses out. Shuu's throat is on fire. He needs something to drink.

 

“Rude.” Motoori's eyebrows raise high up. “Apologize now, Shuu-kun.”

 

He has too much pride to apologize to a Dove.

 

Mootori isn't impressed. He takes out a small remote control... Shuu realizes exactly what it is for when he experienced the jolt of electricity again.

 

“Are you sorry now?” Shuu curls in on himself. He's been through a lot of pain in his life. Hell, he ate part of his own arm. Then, Mootori cranks up the power. A whimper escapes Shuu's mouth unwillingly. “I'll take that for a yes. Our agreement is that we, the CGG, will not interfere with the Tsukiyama family and business. Their end was to provide us with the infamous Gourmet... which happened to be you.”

 

Shuu feels the bitter tang of betrayal. His own parents have abandoned him...

 

He must have made a face because the two lesser investigators laugh openly. Is he just a joke to them? Why did they want the Gourmet? He hasn't hunted in a long time, since joining Kaneki's group.

 

“There, there,” mocks Motoori. “We'll take great care of you, Shuu-kun... But you are filthy, aren't you?”

 

He doesn't answer.

 

Motoori's snap cuts through the tense air. One of the Doves brings in a large bucket.

 

“Drench the ghoul,” orders Motoori. The lesser ranked man does so. The cold water bites. Shuu makes a noise of protest. There's ice in the water! Now... he's soaking wet. His hair drips into his eyes.

 

“Now, your collar, along with having the ability to shock you, functions as an RC inhibitor. I'm sure you've noticed,” he says. “RC cells are known to heal ghouls and keep them from getting sick. Our first experiment will be to see if ghouls can get sick when the RC cells in their body are limited.”

 

Motoori and his men leave the room, leaving Shuu to his misery and dread for what was to come.

 

 

 


	2. Gourmet

 

Only a few hours later, he begins to sneeze. It's weird. It's a  _really_ weird sensation. First, his nose itches. He didn't understand why. Shuu tried to scratch his nose, but that didn't help at all.

 

Then came the loud exhale of 'ah-coo!' that startled him. And then snot. He wipes away the clear fluid. Gross... He shivers.

 

He decides he does not like being sick.

 

Yes, he has had a fever before. But, that was when he was a child who refused to eat. The lack of RC cells had developed into the illness. But, this time, the RC cells were being controlled by an outside force.

 

Specifically the CCG who plan on using him as a guinea pig.

 

The door slides open and he stiffens.

 

It is Motoori and his goons. The man on Motoori's left brings in a chair and sets it on the ground. Mootori himself sits down and takes out a notebook and a pen. He writes something down while observing the flushed body of the ghoul.

 

“Fascinating, but just as expected,” he says dully. “Boring.”

 

Shuu can smell hot horse shit... or human food...

 

“Experiment #2: feed a ghoul human food and watch the results,” he reads out from the paper. “And since your name is... well, 'Gourmet' we have brought suitable food.”

 

One Dove rolls in a tray. On the tray is a regular steak, well done.

 

“ _Bon appetit_ ,” says Mootori. That hurts Shuu. To hear the beautiful language of romance... used to mock him.

 

One Dove pulls Shuu up from the ground. The other Dove takes the fork and knife and cuts the steak into tiny pieces.

 

“What do you think will happen, Nakamura-kun?” asks Mootori.

 

The Dove holding Shuu up responds. “Maybe he'll throw up.”

 

The other Dove cracks up. “I hope he shits himself.”

 

“Well, that'll happen eventually, Yano-kun,” says Mootori. Their laughter only gets louder.

 

There isn't a toilet in the room. ...Where was Shuu supposed to urinate and defecate? Would he... shit in the corner like a dog? Like a filthy animal? It is degrading to see someone fall to such a low position.

 

Yano stabs the fork into the piece of meat and puts it into Shuu's mouth. Immediately he tries to throw up, but Nakamura clamps the ghoul's mouth shut. Steak... tastes like what's inside the garbage can of a public restroom. His eyes water and Shuu's gag reflex tries to get rid of the food he cannot digest.

 

Mootori takes some notes. “As expected, once again, Shuu-kun. You need to entertain us well.”

 

Yano continues force feeding him the disguising and chewy pieces of meat. Saliva escapes Shuu's mouth.

 

“Yano-kun, you got the thread and needle?” asks Nakamura, keeping Shuu's jaw tightly closed.

 

“Yeah...” says Yano, sewing Shuu's mouth shut. The former Gourmet struggles to get away, but ultimately can't win. Why are they sewing his mouth shut? That is unnecessary!

 

The wheels turn in his head. It's so that he cannot get rid of the indigestible mass.

 

“You fail to be a Gourmet,” says Mootori with a click of his tongue. “That's just sad...” He shrugs from the metal seat. “Yano-kun, Nakamura-kun, is there any game you want to play with our dear little Shuu-kun? We're done with the assigned experiments for today.”

 

“Boss,” says Yano, looking at Shuu as if he were a lesser being. To the CCG... ghouls  _are_ lesser beings. “Why does he get to be dressed as nicely as us?”

 

“Yes,” echoes Nakamura. “It doesn't seem fair.”

 

Mootori chuckles softly. “Fine, fine. Let's undress Shuu-kun.” A wave of terror sweeps over him. It's cold enough in the tiny, drafty room. There aren't any blankets to keep him warm.

 

His suit is ripped off of him quickly.

 

One of the Doves – he thinks it was Yano-- kicks him in the stomach. Shuu throws up a little in his mouth and is forced to swallow the bitter mixture. Yano laughs at his anguish.

 

Shuu looks like a regular human underneath his clothes. He was never very muscular. Kaneki was the one who worked out. Banjou had his natural muscles. Shuu dressed to cover up the fact. Without the clothes, he is vulnerable.

 

“Scrawnier than I expected...” Mootori writes something down. “We need to keep that in account for future experimentations.”

 

Shuu curls up, knees to his chest. His sewn lips throb painfully. Will that become infected? It might... No one bothered to clean the patch of skin with alcohol before sewing and they didn't disinfect afterwards.

 

Nakamura pulls on Shuu's hair, forcing him to look up. “It's too bad we sewed this guy's mouth up... Bet he'd give a good blowjob.”

 

Mootori laughs. “You can find out another day... Though, you might want to take care of Shuu-kun's teeth. He can regrow body parts, but you can't.”

 

Yano shakes his head. “Well, there  _is_ something you can fuck.” He traces his finger over Shuu's eyelid. The ghoul's eyes widen in response. 

 

“Ew... people fuck eyesockets?” says Mootori. “That's just nasty. Fucking a man's asshole would be less nasty. Especially if the man doesn't have any poop up there.” He wrinkles his nose. “Just look how afraid the ghoul is. Well, decide on what you want to do... If not, then I have something in mind.” His smile is so genuinely happy, Shuu instinctively moves away from the Dove.

 

Yano kneels by Shuu's side and takes his hand.

 

Shuu doesn't dare meet his eyes.

 

The Dove snaps Shuu's finger as far back as it could go and it breaks loudly. A muffled noise leaves Shuu's shut mouth. The ghoul looks down and notices the bulge pressing against the man's pants.

 

His finger would heal at the same rate a human's would... Yano continues breaking all the fingers of Shuu's left hand. And each broken finger brings a pained noise. The noises turn Yano on. The precum stains his dress pants.

 

“Is it my turn yet?” asks Nakamura. There's a sadistic gleam in his eyes.

 

 

 


	3. Teeth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning !! rape/noncon oral sex in this chapter

 

“Yes, I suppose...” trails off Mootori. He waves off Yano.

 

Nakamura takes out a pocket knife from his back pocket.

 

Shuu backs himself away away away from Nakamura until his back is pressed against the wall and there is nowhere left to go. He is already cold but the wall feels like ice and it _burns._

 

Mootori clicks the pen. “Ah, yes. Knives will work on ghouls with the RC cells not working properly,” he says while jotting something down.

 

Nakamura shakes his head. “I won't stab him, unless he fights.”

 

How would he fight? His RC cells were under control, leaving him weaker than an average human.

 

“What are you planning on doing, then, Nakamura-kun?” asks Mootori. He crosses off whatever he had written.

 

“I want to see his kagune.”

 

“Oh?” says Mootori. “I suppose I'll allow it.” The man fishes out the remote control for the inhibitor. A few beeps and Shuu can feel some RC cells buzz in his body. Not enough for him to manifest his kagune, or even control the hunting organ. “You have to manually stimulate the area where the koukaku pops out of.”

 

“Okay,” said Nakamura excitedly.

 

He forces Shuu to the ground, face against the cold concrete. The ghoul brings his limbs to his core. Nakamura's sweaty hands press against the middle of his back. It's an erogenous zone. The moan that rattles through his throat surprises all the CCG members.

 

Mootori writes something slowly. “Does that feel good, Shuu-kun?”

 

He isn't able to respond.

 

“Press harder, Nakamura-kun,” orders Mootori.

 

Nakamura continues pressing and rubbing against Shuu's back until the pressure got to be too much and the koukaku let itself out. His koukaku usually wound itself in a spiral around his arm, but with the lack of RC cells it flops uselessly to the floor. It is terribly brittle and might break at any moment. The bones in his fingers start to heal. Mootori watches him carefully, finger ready to press one of the many buttons on the remote.

 

Nakamura holds the kagune in one hand. “It's... smaller than I expected,” he admits. “And slippery.”

 

“Slippery,” repeats Mootori and writes it down. He gets up, leaving his notes and pen on the chair. He kneels by Shuu too, taking a hold of the organ. He rubs the wet surface slowly and a wave of unwanted pleasure. “Do you feel good, Shuu-kun?”

 

Mootori forces his legs to open. “Ah. You're hard.” Shuu burns shamefully. The Dove who hovers over him presses the button. “You should be punished. Shuu-kun, how dare you enjoy yourself...” He lets go of the kagune and it falls to the floor.

 

He presses down on the button and the electricity runs through Shuu's body. The ghoul whimpers helplessly. His cock goes soft. He doesn't like pain... Pain isn't enjoyable...

 

“That's a wrap,” says Mootori. “Goodnight, Shuu-kun!” He resets the RC cell inhibitor and the koukaku retreats back into the ghoul's body.

 

He and his men leave, taking the cart and chair away. The room is so barren and cold, with a naked and humiliated Shuu as its centerpiece.

 

* * *

 

 

Shuu must have fallen asleep at some point, curled up in a freezing corner of the room.

 

He jerks up and away when the door opens.

 

“Good morning,” says Mootori. He's holding a small medical kit and the same metal chair from before. He sits down on it and fiddles with the kit. “How are you feeling, Shuu-kun?” He's by himself; the other Doves aren't here. It is just Shuu and Mootori. Alone. His stomach twists and turns, with the remnants of last night's 'meal.'

 

Shuu's back is stiff and his fingers ache. But, most of all he needs to have the threads cut off. It's not like he can answer with his mouth sewn shut. The tiny holes the needle had made itch and are infected.

 

Mootori takes out a small pair of scissors.

 

Will he cut the unsanitary thread?

 

“Come over here,” he says. His fingers beckon Shuu forward. As Shuu starts to get up, Mootori speaks up. “Uh uh uh.” Shuu stills. “Crawl.”

 

The ghoul blinks slowly. He doesn't move. He's been humiliated enough... He's _naked._ He's totally vulnerable, and yet he needs to crawl?

 

“You heard me,” says Mootori. He fishes out the remote control. “Crawl to me, Shuu-kun.”

 

When Shuu doesn't move, the jolt intensifies.

 

“I don't mind if you faint. Eventually, you will crawl to me on your hands and knees,” says the Dove.

 

The sudden increase causes Shuu to curl up in himself. He wants the pain to stop... but he has to suffer more humiliation... When he gets on his hands and knees – like a _dog_ , his mind screams – the shocks stop. Motoori smiles pleasantly.

 

“I'm glad you see it my way,” he says once Shuu is in front of him, right in between Motoori's long legs.

 

The Dove makes quick work of the threads, cutting through them. He plucks out the remnants after he puts the scissors away. Then, Motoori's hands find themselves tangled in Shuu's hair. He pulls on the purple strands painfully and the ghoul releases a yelp.

 

“Good boy,” Motoori says quietly. “Open your mouth.”

 

Shuu does the opposite and clamps his mouth shut. The Dove sighs.

 

“I thought you were being a _good_ boy, Shuu-kun,” he says softly. Mootori's eyes are lidded. He's a devil. His spidery fingers grab onto Shuu's face and presses down on both cheeks. When the pain causes Shuu to open his mouth, Mootori smiles so gently, the ghoul is frightened.

 

“How many teeth does an adult have?” asks the Dove. “Adult humans have 32 teeth... so let me rephrase that question... How many does an adult _ghoul_ have?”

 

Will Mootori count the captive ghoul's teeth?

 

But...

 

It's never that simple, is it?

 

The Dove takes out an old pair of pliers and rips of Shuu's teeth one by one. The ghoul writhes, tries to escape. No anesthetics are administered to dull the pain. The taste of blood fills Shuu's mouth. He can't move; Mootori's hands hold his mouth open and in place. Shuu knows he'll just be electrocuted if he dares rebel.

 

“32, just like a human,” he notes distastefully.

 

Some tears escape Shuu's eyes. Mootori wipes them away with his rough thumbs. It's almost a gentle act, but there's no kindness in his icy eyes. “Crocodile tears, I bet...” he murmurs. One hand grips Shuu's hair harshly. “And now that you have no teeth... we might as well put that to use...”

 

He unzips his pants and pulls out a semi-erect penis, pressing the cock against Shuu's mouth. “Open up, Shuu-chan.”

 

Shuu swallows back a sob.

 

“Lick it,” Mootori orders, hand on the remote control.

 

Shuu licks hesitantly. He's never given a blowjob before. He doesn't have any sexual experience. To be raped by a member of the CCG is not how he'd picture losing his virginity.

 

He doesn't think he understood the difference between romantic interest and interest in eating. Maybe that was why Shuu never killed his prey? It's too late for that. It's too late to hope he'll escape with the weight of the inhibitor around his thin neck.

 

Mootori thrusts in Shuu's mouth and the ghoul almost throws up. The Dove's cock touches the back of his parched throat. He fucks Shuu's mouth until he comes in the ghoul's bloody and gummy mouth.

 

Mootori pulls Shuu off of his flaccid penis. “Now swallow.”

 

The Gourmet does so, tears burning his vision. It's bitter and salty and doesn't mix well with the steak that sits in his stomach.

 

The Dove smiles and pets Shuu's hair, hitting his head with a good amount of force each time.

 

“See, it's not hard, Shuu-kun,” he says.

 

“My parents will kill you when they find out,” Shuu spits out angrily. His knees press against the cool skin of his chest, hiding the core of his body. The words come out sloppily. It's harder to talk without any teeth.

 

Mootori laughs. “You and I know just how wrong that is,” he says. “Your parents gave you to us, the CCG. As long as you're kept alive by us, they won't bother us and we won't bother them. You know just how _useless_ you are to them, Shuu-kun.”

 

It hurts. He doesn't want to admit how true that is.

 

“You stayed in your home for _years._ Face it, your parents had no other use for you,” he continues. “All you did was use up their money and resources.” It hurts. “They don't need you around. Nobody really needs you around, Shuu-kun. The sooner you realize it, the easier it will be.” It hurts.

 

He leaves without another word.

 

Shuu throws up on the floor. It's a mix of gourmet quality food, sticky white semen, and blood. It stinks and Shuu crawls backwards to get away with it. His back finds the smooth and cold surface of the wall.

 

He rests his forehead on his knees.

 

He is never going to leave, is he?

 

 


	4. Eyes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning !! violence and eye gore in this chapter

 

The door opens with a clang, startling him from almost-sleep.

 

Who is it? Shuu doesn't know. They're wearing a mask. And in one hand... they're holding a quinque that resembles a sledge-hammer way too much for his liking. The ghoul is already pressed against the wall.

 

The masked figure – it can't be a ghoul-- approaches with quick and long strides. “Hello Gourmet,” he says. It's a deep voice. He chuckles. “Look at yourself... You're so sad to look at...”

 

“Do you remember Karube Misono-chan?” he hisses out.

 

He doesn't really remember... Who is she?

 

When Shuu doesn't answer, the masked man gets louder. “You gouged out her eyes and left her alone!” he yells and Shuu flinches. “Oh... you're afraid now, huh? Do you know how sick it was? She was so scared and hurt. Why did you take her sight away from her? Why?”

 

Oh... He remembers her... Her eyes were so pretty, so he thought it'd be best to eat them.

 

The masked man laughs bitterly. “I've been looking for you _for years_ to take revenge for her. She was my daughter. And now she's _gone_.” That girl is dead and her father is seeking revenge...

 

“Do you have anything to say for yourself?” he asks.

 

He doesn't. He doesn't regret it. He regrets that she has... died... But, Shuu isn't sure if he would change that event if he could.

 

“I thought not,” spat the man. His mask is white and covers his entire face. There isn't a design on it, like the masks of ghouls. He slams the quinque against the side of Shuu's head, knocking the ghoul over onto the cold, hard ground.

 

Shuu knows that he must be bleeding.

 

He tries to crawl away when he's hit again. This time, the quinque crushes his arm. Bits of his bone lodge painfully in skin and muscles. The Gourmet cries out in pain. His arm is broken, useless.

 

“I'll make you feel what she did...” he hisses, pulling out a knife. The man puts all his weight on the ghoul's torso, when Shuu is too busy trying to move his arm. It's his right arm – his dominant arm – that's broken. The man's knees rest on Shuu's shoulders. The ghoul screams out in pain. It's blinding, it really is.

 

The scream becomes nothing more than a strangled gasp for help when the man's meaty hand wraps itself around Shuu's throat.

 

The knife glides over his eyes.

 

Everything is red.

 

 

* * *

 

[  _ He can't see... Touka... Touka Kirishima... She's beaten him in a fight. _

 

_Her kagune has sliced open his eyes..._

 

_That's why he can't see... but it still stings bitterly_

 

_Had that all been a terrible, terrible nightmare?_

 

_He's relieved_

 

_But_

 

_Is there no badass Kaneki?_

 

_Is he not being tortured by the CCG?_

 

_ Is he...  _ safe _?  _ ]

 

 

Oh, it isn't all a dream.

 

He cannot see... Blood is crusted over his eyes... Trying to open his eyelids is mind-numbingly painful. He can't move his right arm... He can't even...  _ feel _ it. Shuu panics; is his arm  _ missing _ ? Or just very, very horribly broken? So it wasn't all a dream. Warm tears leave his damaged eyes. He wants to go back home. Go back to his bed. If he just never left home, he wouldn't be with the CCG members who only wanted to hurt him.

 

His crying alerts someone.

 

He hears quick footsteps coming to his side.

 

“Shuu-kun.” It's Mootori. “You're awake now... Human medicine does not provide you ghouls with much, huh?”

 

Shuu can't answer.

 

“Anyway, I'll tell you about your injuries.” He sounds as if he's being incredibly generous. “You can probably already tell that your eyes have been scratched up pretty bad. You arm was broken very badly, Shuu-kun. We amputated it. You'll just grow it back,” Mootori says. “Your head has been hit pretty hard. There might be some damage to your brain, but you'll just heal it next time we give you access to your RC cells, so it's no big deal.”

 

He feels his head throb. Shuu doesn't process the words properly.

 

“One of the lesser ranked investigators attacked you without my permission... Which is just unacceptable,” Mootori says. The CCG member isn't angry that he was attacked. He was angry that Shuu was attacked  _ without permission.  _ “You're still in your cell, Shuu-kun, but you're bandaged up and...  _ someone _ donated a shirt.”

 

That's right... He is warmer now. He's wearing someone else's shirt. It covers Shuu up... decently. At least his cock and ass aren't exposed. Whoever's shirt he's wearing... it smells nice.

 

“Ew. You're sniffing that guy's shirt?” Mootori kicks him, and Shuu tries to use his right arm to catch himself, forgetting that the arm is missing. “That's so gross, Shuu-kun... Are you thinking about eating the man who thought you needed something to wear?” Shuu could hear the sneer in Mootori's voice.

 

He isn't thinking about eating the man in the first place! He doesn't know the man or if the man fits his standards when it comes to food.

 

But Shuu isn't hungry.

 

The last time he ate, it wasn't food that he could use to nourish himself. He can't trust anything this Dove does for him.

 

“The higher ups  _ really  _ want to keep you alive, Shuu-kun,” Mootori continues. He sighs. “I mean, I can understand why. You're a fun toy. You make some nice sounds...” 

 

Shuu's blood freezes when he hears the zipper open.

 

“On your knees, Shuu-kun,” says Mootori softly. Shuu sobs and Mootori lets out a low moan. “I haven't even touched you yet and you're making those nice sounds for me...” The ghoul does as told. If he fights it, then he'll only bring more pain onto himself...

 

Mootori's hands find themselves on the smooth skin of Shuu's thighs. He pushes into the ghoul's ass and lets out a low moan. “Tight,” he moans. No lubrication to ease Shuu's pain... The Gourmet cries messily, snot running from his nose. His hand wobbles and he can't hold himself up anymore.

 

Shuu crashes to the ground, but the Dove holds his ass up in the air, moving his hands to hold Shuu's hips. Mootori doesn't care. As long as Shuu doesn't enjoy the brutal treatment. When part of Shuu's insides split open, he's given a kind of lubrication in the form of his own blood. The Dove's grip on his narrow hips is tight and unrelenting, like the way he thrusts.

 

To Shuu's horror, Mootori's dick brushes against something inside of him that makes him feel pleasure...

 

“Oh, you're sick,” Mootori breathes out. “I can't believe you're actually enjoying this Shuu-kun.” The Dove thrusts slowly. “Are you pretending that I am someone else, perhaps? You're blind for now, so I guess that would make sense. Do you have any friends? Can ghouls even have friends?”

 

One of the man's hands grabs Shuu's erect penis and gives it a squeeze. It's too tight, Shuu thinks.

 

“Don't touch me,” he lets out. His voice is so quiet and it cracks.

 

“Oh?” says Mootori. He stops fucking Shuu momentarily. Having something inside of him, stretching his asshole, is a weirder sensation than sneezing. Do people really enjoy having sex? Blood trickles out from his torn asshole. Then Mootori laughs. “You aren't in a position to tell me what to do, Shuu-kun,” he says lightly.

 

Mootori's hand lets go of Shuu's dick and instead goes for his throat. “You're pretty badly bruised, Shuu-kun,” he observes. “I'm jealous that I didn't inflict these wounds...” The Dove clicks his tongue. “Maybe another time, then.”

 

He fucks Shuu until Mootori's cum releases inside Shuu's torn asshole. The Dove lets go of the ghoul's hips, letting his lower half crash to the ground too.

 

“Would you look at that, Shuu-kun?” says Mootori. “You've stained the shirt that he was so kind to let you have...”

 

Shuu is still hard, painfully so... He can hear Mootori kneel by his side and take hold of his cock. The Dove finishes the unwanted handjob, squeezing too hard and jerking too fast until Shuu's seed spills out onto Mootori's hand.

 

The dirty hand is pressed against the corner of his mouth. “Clean up your mess, Shuu-kun,” says Mootori, almost parentally. “We don't want to punish you more, do we, Shuu-kun?”

 

The ghoul shakes his head.

 

“Good.”

 

He's forced to lick his own cum off of Mootori's hand. It's sour. Not something he would eat if he had a choice. When Shuu's finished, Mootori gets up off the floor and leaves.

 

Shuu sniffs the collar of the dress shirt sadly, trying to seek comfort from the soft fabric.

 

 

 


	5. Haise, pt1

 

“Hey there...” says a new voice. Shuu can't exactly place who it belongs to. It's not bad to wake up to. “Please wake up...”

 

Shuu sits up, fingers going to the shirt collar.

 

“Oh, yeah. That's my shirt... But, you can keep it if you want... We can get you another one.” Whoever it is, they walk to Shuu and kneel by the ghoul's side. “I've been given special clearance to feed you and bathe you, Tsukiyama-san.”

 

He's shaking. Why is this Investigator being nice to him...? What is he going to do?

 

The man's hand touches Shuu's shoulder – the one that still has an arm attached to it. He's being so gentle towards the ghoul... Can someone cry if their eyes are so badly damaged? “There... there... You're safe.” The 'for now' is left unspoken.

 

“Can you stand?” asks the unnamed and unseen man.

 

Shuu shakes his head. His lower back radiates pain. He knows that when he stands blood and cum will drip down from his ass. How humiliating... for someone else to see how gross he's become.

 

“That's okay,” says the man, trying to comfort him. “I'm going to pick you up now.” He picks up the ghoul bridal style. Shuu's arm instinctively goes behind the man's neck. Then he stiffens, realizing what he's done. Is he allowed to touch the other man? Will he be punished? Where's the remote for the inhibitor around his neck...? “Don't worry. That's fine,” reassures the man, shifting the ghoul's weight.

 

Shuu's head leans against the man's chest when he gets too tired. His scent is sweet...

 

“Please don't fall asleep, Tsukiyama-san,” he says. “We're almost in the Quinx section.” Shuu doesn't know what that is. “I'm the Quinx Squad's leader... I never did say my name, huh... I'm Sasaki Haise.”

 

Haise sets him down on something soft... a bed? Shuu freezes in place.

 

“I'll go run the bath for you,” Haise says.

 

Shuu is rigid, sitting completely straight. Underneath him is most likely a towel... so he can't stain the poor Dove's bed. He's uncomfortable... He has not been hurt yet. Shuu waits for the jolt of electricity or maybe even the blow of a fist.

 

“The water's ready.” Haise's voice echoes off the bathroom walls. Probably tiles... The Dove walks back to him. “I'm going to pick you up again.” Haise is very careful while bringing the battered Shuu to the tub.

 

He sits the ghoul on the edge of the tub. “Can we take off your shirt, Tsukiyama-san?” he asks. Shuu raises his arm robotically as Haise pulls it off of his thin frame. “I'll put this in the washer later...”

 

Shuu is lowered into the warm water, which slowly turns red.

 

Haise clicks his tongue. That's no good... His stomach burns with anger... Yes, this man might be a ghoul, but how twisted do you have to be to find enjoyment in hurting another being...? Something jagged-- a dagger? – had scratched at his eyes. It's infected; greenish yellow discharge leaks from the cut. One arm is missing...

 

The ghoul opens his mouth to release a whine. Haise notices that all of his teeth have been ripped out.

 

He dips a washcloth into the water and rubs a bar of soap onto it. “Tsukiyama-san, I'll wash you now.” The ghoul can't see, so it's better to say something before going through with the action, Haise thinks. He doesn't want to scare or hurt someone like him more than his torturers have...

 

Haise rubs the washcloth in circles on the skin of Shuu's back. There aren't any wounds there... He doesn't want to say anything. He wishes he was told about the.... 'experiments' earlier. He's not ranked highly enough to stop them, but Haise gets along with Arima...

 

It was Arima that vouched for him.

 

“Tsukiyama-san, I'll wash your face now.” He rubs carefully at the caked on blood and fluids. Shuu flinches; it must hurt. His hair is really dirty... some blood sticks to the purple strands. “Can I... wash your hair?”

 

Haise waits for an answer.

 

Shuu nods...

 

“Okay...” says Haise, grabbing a small cup. He pours warm water into it. “I'm going to pour water over your head.” When his hair is damp, Haise massages shampoo onto Shuu's scalp. The ghoul makes a soft noise at the back of his throat. “Did I pull your hair? Sorry, it's a bit tangled...”

 

The ghoul shakes his head, but doesn't say anything.

 

“I'll comb your hair later, Tsukiyama-san,” he says. Haise knows he's babbling, but he can't help it. He needs to fill the uncomfortable silence with something. The water is red now... Gross...

 

Haise pulls the drain plug, letting the water swirl down. Shuu brings his knees up to his chest and shivers.

 

“Sorry, again. The water didn't look very clean.” Haise puts the plug back and turns on the water. It's loud, breaking the quiet. He pours more water, rinsing the shampoo suds from Shuu's hair.

 

The ghoul waits for this Dove to betray him, to break the fragile trust that's built between them. Haise is the only one of his 'caretakers' to have not hurt him as of yet. Haise dries Shuu by patting his skin gently with a fluffy, white towel.

 

Shuu is sitting on the edge of the bathtub again.

 

“Please stay here, Tsukiyama-san. I'll go find you something to wear,” Haise says. Shuu shivers and wraps the stained towel around himself. He's dry, of course, but...

 

Haise returns with a shirt and sweatpants. “I think that these should be your size...” he says. They're some of Arima's old clothes. Shuu obediently does whatever is asked of him. The Dove frowns... something does not seem right... The Gourmet... should be proud. Not like a child, listening for orders.

 

“I'm going to pick you up again, Tsukiyama-san,” he says. “I'm going to put you down on the bed. Then, I'm going to get you your meal... I think that I'm supposed to give you a cup of blood.” Shuu doesn't respond. The warm water and clothes makes him sleepy.

 

Haise sets him down on the bed and goes to his apartment's kitchen, but by the time he's back, Shuu has already fallen asleep.

 

 


	6. Haise, pt2

 

Haise sighs and puts the cup of warm blood on his bedside table.

 

He must be cold. The ghoul is covered by the towel. It's terribly wet and stained with blood and... other substances... Haise is going to have to throw it out... He isn't going to complain. At least with Shuu asleep, Haise can't hand him back over to his tormentors.

 

He did promise to return the Gourmet _after_ he was fed... With the ghoul still not fed, he's safe... at least for a while.

 

It's the most Haise can do for the other man.

 

Haise doesn't have much power in the CCG. They don't respect him; he's just a docile ghoul in their eyes.

 

He covers Shuu with the thick comforter. The ghoul moves in his sleep, curling up into the fetal postion. He says something too, but Haise doesn't catch it. Sounds... vaguely like a name. Maybe a friend? He hopes that Shuu's friend will try to save the poor man. Though... he can't say that that would be an easy task to acomplish.

 

Haise is pretty tired too. He changes into his pajamas and finds a spare blanket.

 

“Guess I'm sleeping on the couch tonight,” he says to himself.

 

 

He's not... exactly right.

 

Haise wakes up a few hours later to a crash. What the heck was that? he wants to know. Haise's heart beats rapidly. He is fully awake now. Fully terrified too.

 

“Tsukiyama-san,” Haise calls out, walking into the bedroom. “What's wrong?” He sees the man tangled up in the sheets on the floor. “Oh... are you okay?” The other man doesn't answer. He only struggles against the sheets harder.

 

“Here... Let me help,” says Haise, going to where he's sprawled out.

 

He twitches, but otherwise doesn't react.

 

“Can you tell me what happened, Tsukiyama-san?” asks Haise, covering the ghoul's shoulders with the blanket. Now would be a good time to give him the blood to drink. Haise frowns. He'll feed Shuu in the morning.

 

“I...” his voice is unexpectedly soft. “I had a nightmare.” It's familiar. Where has he heard it before? Shuu sounds... ashamed of even admitting that he had a bad dream.

 

But... Haise has nightmares too.

 

“Let's go back to sleep,” he suggests, picking Shuu up from the floor and putting him in the bed. The man is stiff in his arms. Haise won't hurt him. He hopes that Shuu knows that...

 

He tucks the ghoul in.

 

But, before he can go, Shuu grabs onto Haise's shirt. “Please... would you not go?” Haise thinks he's on the roof of some building for a second. What... was that? He's been quiet for a long minute. Shuu lets go of the shirt and retreats into himself.

 

“Okay,” says Haise softly. “Please move over then, Tsukiyama-san.”

 

Shuu scoots over, making room for the other man. It feels safer... having Haise around. Even though he's also a Dove, there's a comforting familiarity about him.

 

Haise gets in the bed and covers the two of them.

 

It's going to be an interesting night, Haise thinks as Shuu falls asleep. He wonders who'll have a nightmare first.

 

 

* * *

 

He's woken up by Haise shaking his shoulder.

 

“Good morning, Tsukiyama-san,” he says. “Did you sleep well?”

 

The ex-Gourmet nods. He's not talking today? Haise doesn't say anything. He's not going to force the other man to talk when he doesn't want to.

 

“That's good,” he says.

 

Haise gets out of the bed and stretches. He can hear his bones pop and creak. Tsukiyama's head is at an angle to listen to the sounds better.

 

“I'm going to reheat some blood,” Haise says.

 

Before he can leave the room, Shuu reaches out and tries to grab onto his shirt. He misses. He can't see. His fingers miss by painfully few inches. Is he... is Shuu afraid of being alone?

 

“Should... should I take you with me?” asks Haise.

 

Shuu seems to think about it before nodding slowly.

 

“Alright then, Tsukiyama-san. I'm picking you up now.” Once again, Haise is shocked by how light the other man is. Blood won't add weight back onto the skeletal frame. It will... simply keep Shuu _alive_.

 

He sets Shuu down on a kitchen seat and takes out a packet of blood.

 

Shuu can smell when Haise opens it. There are chemicals in it... What kind...? Will it sit in his stomach? He might just throw up when his... tormentors get custody back. Why... why can't he stay here-- here, where it's safe – forever?

 

Soon enough, a warm glass filled with blood is given to him.

 

The fluid goes down his throat slowly. It's like a thick syrup. Just a hint of sweetness... But, it's more of a candy than a real meal. His stomach probably wouldn't handle eating something solid...

 

* * *

 

He is returned to the big, empty room... When will Mootori come for him?

 

Anxiety and dread builds in his heart. Every little noise startles the ghoul. He lies in a corner of the room. The small room has been cleaned of his blood and vomit and piss. That's good... But, it smells of the various disinfectant sprays and antibacterial cleaning fluids.

 

It burns the back of Shuu's throat. He coughs weakly, but that doesn't help.

 

What was that?

 

Is there someone outside of the door?

 

He can hear footsteps... right outside of the door...

 

He bites back the coughs, with some difficulty, and curls more into himself. It itches. He wants to scratch and scratch and scratch at his throat until he rips it open. Maybe then Shuu would find peace if all the blood in his body left him. If he dies... then they can't hurt him anymore.

 

The door slides open.

 

There's the sound of multiple feet. At least two people...

 

“Welcome back, Shuu-kun,” coos out Mootori's voice. Ah, that's one. The other must be one of his lackeys. “We've cleaned your room.” His... room... Shuu's heart sinks to his stomach. That's right; he's here for the rest of his life.

 

“Fucking gross,” complains the other man. It sounds like Nakamura. It must be Nakamura.

 

“Anyway,” says Mootori. The high pitched beep tells Shuu that Mootori has pressed a button on the inhibitor's remote. Then... to his shock, he can feel the RC cells in his body repair his eyes and start to regrow his arm. It's blindingly painful; he almost wishes to remain blind and crippled. Anything to make the pain go away...

 

His new arm is a shade or two lighter than the rest of his skin.

 

His eyes water. It's far too bright for the new nerves.

 

And with him just barely healed, the RC cells lose their function.

 

“It's very bright, yes?” says Mootori. “Hmmm, your eyes look pretty gross. Maybe we should gouge them out.”

 

Nakamura smiles sweetly at the idea.

 

Shuu shivers.

 

Then Mootori shakes his head. “Perhaps not today, Nakamura-kun... He has just eaten... It would be bad if he threw up all that blood, right? More cleaning for us.”

 

“Some paperwork too...” adds Nakamura.

 

Paperwork? Just because he would vomit...? How... odd. Is there a reason behind this...?

 

“Yes, unfortunately,” mutters Mootori distastefully. “It seems as if complaints were filed against these experiments...” R-really? More tears spring to his eyes. Would they free him if the full extent of his treatment was found out? He chides himself. Don't get your hopes up, Shuu thinks.

 

But...

 

Someone knew.

 

Someone else thought what Mootori and his men were doing is wrong.

 

Someone even dared complain...

 

Shuu weeps bitterly when they leave.

 

 

 

 


	7. Kagune

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading *o-o*

They don't rip out his teeth again.

 

Instead, Mootori appears later (the next day? two?) with a strange piece of leather. It goes around his mouth and a ball holds his mouth painfully open. Mootori closes it with a loud click.

 

“There,” he says. “All done.”

 

Saliva slips out of his mouth. This day, Yano is the one at Mootori's side.

 

“He has a big mouth,” mutter Yano.

 

“I know,” says Mootori. He smirks like he has a secret. He's fucked that mouth. And he'll do so again in the future. But that isn't why they're there today. He presses a button, letting some of the RC cells flow through the ghoul's body. “Today will be experiment number...” He looks down at the clipboard. “Experiment #4!”

 

He doesn't read what the experiment is.

 

Yano seems to know and kneels by Shuu's side. “Haise-san needs to stop donating clothing for our pet ghoul,” he complains while stripping Shuu of the baggy shirt. The cold air hits Shuu's torso.

 

Yano flips him so that he lies on his stomach.

 

His fingers – long and spidery – massage at the spot where Shuu's koukaku comes out. Why does it have to feel so good? Shuu curses himself when a moan escapes. It's muffled by the gag, but both members of the CCG heard it.

 

The koukaku spills out and wraps itself partially around Yano's arm.

 

“Ew,” he says. “They're veins on this thing!”

 

“Fascinating,” says Mootori, not sounding fascinated whatsoever. “Cut it off.”

 

W-what? They're going to cut off his kagune? He struggles, until a jolt of electricity runs through him.

 

“Shuu-kun,” he says, exasperated. “I thought we've been through this.” The knife cuts through his kagune, like it's made of butter. Blood spurts out, soaking the borrowed sweatpants and Yano's suit. “It doesn't matter how much pain you're in. It doesn't matter if you want to live or die. Shuu-kun, you will be used by the CCG countless times over. Just give up.”

 

Yano saws through the RC cells until the kagune falls onto the floor, like a wriggling centipede.

 

Shuu gasps for breath; a part of him has been cut off. He's hyperventilating. The ball gag in his mouth doesn't help. The blood and kagune fluid just keeps on pouring out.

 

“Shuu-kun, stop shaking,” orders Mootori.

 

But, he _can't_.

 

He can't stop shaking and struggling to breathe. He's convulsing on the floor, much like the kagune that has now gone still.

 

“I said, _stop shaking_ ,” he says, even louder. Mootori grabs Shuu and forces him to sit up. The ghoul looks everywhere but at the Dove. “Yano,” snaps Mootori. “Take off the gag!”

 

“Sir?”

 

“Do as I said! This stupid ghoul forgot how to breathe,” he hisses out. The gag comes off and with it comes pools and pools of saliva.

 

“Hnnn, ahhh.” Strangled noises leaves his mouth. He's still shaking. The additional air doesn't help. He can't get enough. The RC cells in his body aren't doing anything. He can't feel them, but they have to be there...

 

“Sir, he still has his teeth,” says Yano.

 

“I know. I already set the RC cell level to its lowest setting,” he says. Mootori isn't touching Shuu. Good, in a way. But, Shuu wishes that someone was there to rub his back and promise that everything will be okay.

 

It's a while before he stops shaking.

 

He falls back onto the floor, exhausted.

 

Yano collects his kagune-- the _sample_ , as they call it – and puts it onto the cart. What will they do with it? He looks displeased when he sees the sticky mess on his hand. “Gross,” Yano mutters.

 

Mootori looks at the only partially-there ghoul. “I know.”

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

“It's a prototype,” says one of the technicians. He's a balding, middle-aged man. The new quinque looks like it's on the brittle side. Fragile and thin... But that's not what causes Haise's eyes to widen in horror.

 

The familiar scent that just _rolls_ off of it is.

 

It's that _ghoul_ he took care of!

 

“Sasaki-san,” says Tooru, looking concerned. “W-what's wrong?”

 

“Where is the ghoul you made this quinque from?” he demands. He can't keep the revulsion from his voice. Haise will probably be disciplined later for his outburst, but he doesn't care. It would be a slap on the wrist, compared to what has been done to the ghoul.

 

Have they killed Shuu?

 

“Huh?” lets out the technician. “Well, I don't know. I was only given the kagune, not the entire ghoul.”

 

So there's a chance that he's alive.

 

But...

 

But, without a ghoul's kagune – made up of the _majority_ of his RC cells – how can the CCG expect Shuu to regenerate? Especially if they only fed him some blood! Some blood, once a month, wouldn't replenish the RC cells that they ripped out from his body.

 

“E-excuse me,” says Haise, before walking out of the room.

 

Why does he feel responsible for the captured Gourmet?

 

He rushes to the elevator and presses the button labeled '15.' It stops before getting to that floor. Arima gets into the elevator.

 

It's just the two of them.

 

“Haise,” says Arima. “What are you doing here? Don't you and the Quinx have a training session scheduled?” His cool voice doesn't accurately portray how concerned he is.

 

“Yes, but... Arima-san,” says Haise. “You remember the Gourmet?”

 

The other white haired man nods. “Yes... I did lend you some of my clothes for him...”

 

“Well, they've made a quinque out of his kagune,” says Haise.

 

Arima lets out a soft 'huh.' After collecting his thoughts, he says,”I... was not informed of that fact. But, the Gourmet is still alive... right?”

 

Haise frowns. “I think so, but...” He doesn't finish that sentence. The elevator door slides open. They're on the 15th floor, where most experiments take place. Haise gulps.

 

Shuu's 'room' is the sixth one to the right.

 

Haise types in the passcode.

 

The doors slide open. The coppery, sweet scent of blood and the disgusting scent of urine assaults their noses.

 

There's a lot of blood, Haise realizes with a start. It's dried blood, cracking on the floor. It's a stark contrast to the white of the room. Shuu is curled up in a corner of the room. His forehead is touching his knees. That cannot be comfortable.

 

“Tsukiyama-san,” Haise blurts out.

 

He's not wearing a shirt. The shirt that Arima had given him... that shirt is lying on the ground in a crumpled heap. But, Shuu's shoulderblade is bloody and raw. So much blood from that...?

 

“Tsukiyama-san,” he says again, going to the other ghoul's side. Arima steps into the room. The door slides closed, hiding them from prying eyes. The Gourmet doesn't react _at all_ to his own name.

 

Arima picks up the shirt. It's cold in the room. It's okay if his shirt gets dirty. He has plenty more.

 

Shuu makes eye-contact with Haise and there's a spark of recognition in his eyes. Then there's more tears. “K-kaneki-kun...” he says softly. His throat is raw too, but from screaming. “Kaneki-kun,” he says again, reaching a mutilated hand out.

 

Haise's head hurts and he takes a few steps away from the injured man. That's not his name... that's _not_ his name.

 

_Oh no_ , Arima thinks. He hasn't accounted for this... Nobody has...

 

Shuu drops the arm and flinches. He's waiting to be hit, Arima thinks.

 

“Tsukiyama-kun,” says Arima. His voice is steady, quiet. Haise is still reeling from the forgotten memories. “That is Haise-kun, not your other _friend_.” He avoids using that name. He shrugs off his jacket. “Here, let's put this jacket on you. It must be cold.” Yes... it'll stain, but he owns so many...

 

Arima is so used to killing these creatures.

 

Kane- _Haise_ had fascinated him...

 

Perhaps, he'd be fascinated by this ghoul as well...

 

With hesitation, Shuu allows Arima to wrap the long, Dove jacket around his shoulders.

 

“Isn't that better?” he says. “We need to go get Mootori... You need to heal, Tsukiyama-kun. So please, wait here for us.” He sees Shuu pull the jacket closer to himself.

 

How can a flesh eating thing be so pitiful? he thinks to himself.

 

 

 

 

 

 


	8. Ear

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw: for gore !!

A heart.

 

Still bloody.

 

It _has_ got to be fresh.

 

Arima – a Dove, specifically the grim reaper of the CCG-- looks strangely domestic while cutting up the _human_ heart. Shuu is seated in Haise's kitchen. The jacket has been replaced by a soft, fleece blanket. They've dressed him up in more of Haise's old clothes. They're too small, but the new clothes are better than the freshly ruined pair of pants.

 

The white-- slowly turning red – bandages cover up the gaping wound, preventing this shirt from becoming stained.

 

“There,” says Arima when he's done cutting up the organ.

 

Where did he get it? Haise is afraid to ask...

 

Arima hands the fork over to Shuu.

 

The ghoul's hand shakes and shakes until he drops it. It hits the floor loudly. Shuu ducks his head. Is he waiting for punishment?

 

Haise sighs as he bends down to pick up the fork. He washes it before giving it back to Shuu. “Tsukiyama-san,” says Haise, thinking of an idea. “Would you like me to feed you?”

 

Shuu doesn't respond. He sits stiffly and upright.

 

Haise sticks the fork through a piece of the organ and brings it to Shuu's mouth. He has his teeth now. That's good, he thinks. It'd be easier for Shuu to eat.

 

Technically, they could get into trouble for this... but, if they didn't feed him and lower the inhibitor level, this ghoul would have died. Haise is angry. That Mootori... Haise would love to rip him a new one. He was being unnecessarily cruel and reckless towards the health of the only ghoul he's responsible for.

 

Shuu swallows the bloody piece of meat.

 

He can digest it... but he can't hold much more in his stomach.

 

Haise's eyes follow the bob of his throat. Shuu's eyes are lidded. They didn't even turn. Their utmost priority at the moment, is to feed him and then let him rest. It's strange, Haise thinks. There's a sense of overwhelming familiarity coming from the ghoul.

 

Who is-- was he to his past self?

 

To meet another from his old life... Haise doesn't want his old memories.

 

 

Soon enough, Shuu is asleep on the couch.

 

Haise sighs quietly. His past self... must have known the Gourmet well... He looks to Arima, who is cleaning the bloody plate and utensils.

 

“What are we going to do?” asks Haise. “We didn't even get permission for this...” He doesn't regret it. Nobody deserves to die... especially due to something that could have easily been avoided. Nobody deserves to be tortured-- human or ghoul. It sickens him that Mootori... Mootori must have known.

 

Mootori must have known that Shuu couldn't heal himself when most of the RC cells were forcibly extracted.

 

And then there's the whispering at the back of his head... It scares him...

 

If... _when_ he regains his memories, will the Sasaki Haise of the Quinx squad still exist?

 

Arima snaps him out of his thoughts. “I fear that the agreement between the Tsukiyama family and the CCG will be broken soon,” he says. That's right... The Gourmet's own family sold him into this... this... unending torture... Haise doesn't remember his own parents; would they do the same?

 

“Why?” asks Haise.

 

Arima looks at Shuu; his breaths are shallow and the two of them can hear each one. Are his lungs damaged too? The RC cells in his body slowly heal him. It's not fast enough.

 

“If it weren't for your interference, Haise-kun,” he says,”the Gourmet would have already passed away. Seeing an S ranked ghoul in this state...” Arima frowns. He doesn't finish that sentence.

 

Haise doesn't prompt him to continue... Restrictions needed to be placed on Mootori and his companions... the sooner, the better.

* * *

 

 

 

Mootori is mad.

 

Mootori doesn't hurt him for two whole weeks. (He thinks it's been two weeks? He isn't sure.) The four white walls are too much for him. Sometimes, his lackeys come in and preform mild experiments on him. It doesn't hurt too much when they stab him with a silver fork.

 

But when will the days return to normal?

 

When will the harsher, more painful experiments continue?

 

The wait is killing him...

 

[ _They're_

_killing_

_him._ ]

 

Yano shaves half of his head. The _bzzz-bzzz_ of the electric shaver has him very, very still. Something will go wrong something will go wrong something will go wrong. His hair tickles his pale skin before landing on him, on the floor.

 

Why just half of his head? He'll never know.

 

Then, something _does_ go wrong.

 

_His ear his ear it's off it's been sliced off it's on the floor right next to his leg_

 

“Oops,” says Yano. “My hand... slipped...”

 

There's blood gushing down the side of Shuu's face. His hand – the one that had been mangled, now healed – goes up. It touches the warm, warm blood. His mouth opens and he lets out a scream.

 

“H-hey,” he says. Yano's scared; the ghoul never made _that_ much noise. “Keep it down,” he hisses out. Shuu doesn't hear him. He just keeps on screaming, hand clawing at the bloody patch of skin.

 

When Shuu doesn't stop, Yano fishes out the remote to the inhibitor. He starts pressing it-- zap, zap zap! The ghoul convulses on the floor, ragged breathing not the only thing leaving his body. He pisses himself before going completely still.

 

“Aw, man,” complains Yano. This is why they shouldn't allow the ghoul to be clothed! He just messes up everything that's given to him. The... removal of his ear had been accidental. And that reaction... nobody would have expected that!

 

Shuu's eyes are glassy, empty.

 

It's like he's some _creepy_ doll.

 

The Dove takes the pants off of the captured Gourmet.

 

They are in hot water with the CCG's reaper and his pet ghoul, but the higher ups didn't care as much. As long as the ghoul is kept alive and ready for experimentations... they'd turn a blind eye to the abuse.

 

Shuu's dick flops against his thigh. It's strange to know that ghouls and humans had such similar anatomy. Yano's hard. He shouldn't be, but he is.

 

There's nothing beautiful about the bloody ghoul.

 

His ribs stick out against pale, dirty skin. He stinks too-- he smells like something rotting. How can a living thing smell like that? They should have him cleaned soon, Yano thinks to himself...

 

But he'll take care of a different problem first.

 

He unbuckles his pants and lets them pool around his ankles. Shuu is already on his back, on the ground. It's easy to separate his soft thighs and enter inside of him. The ghoul's back arches and he lets out a sob. Will Mootori care if he does this? The better question is: will Mootori find out?

 

The ghoul won't talk, can't seem to talk.

 

He'd just have to get rid of any stains... He tells himself. But, Yano has always lacked motivation. Mootori wouldn't punish him too severely anyway. It's not like Mootori hasn't done the same to the ghoul.

 

The ghoul's eyes look anywhere but at him. How insulting! Yano would say he's not _bad_ looking. It's tight and he moans. The friction and heat are unbearable! Why hasn't he done this sooner?

 

Blood pools where Shuu's ear is missing.

 

Blood drips out of his ass.

 

Tsukiyama Shuu wants to die. He doesn't want to continue on. Fuck whatever agreement his parents worked out with the CCG. He's not going to escape, he knows. Nobody's going to save him. There's no hope for anything but death.

 

But how can he kill himself?

 

They leave nothing sharp for him to cut himself with. They don't leave drugs for him to overdose on. The room he's in lacks even rope and a place to hang himself. There's nothing. Nothing for him.

 

It... would be best if they slaughtered him and made one last quinque out of him. How much more torture will be inflicted before they get bored? They're... creative, unfortunately.

 

Yano comes and shudders and gasps.

 

The sticky whiteness spills out of his ass when Yano pulls out. More blood drips out too. He's lying there, not even half-hard. His eyes look at the ceiling. Will the Dove leave now?

 

Yes, he does leave, retrieving the piss soaked pants.

 

Shuu turns onto his side. His eyes follow the faint lines on the wall. His mouth is dry. His tongue licks the bloody gums of his mouth.

 

The only other thing in the room is his detached ear.

 

It seems as if Yano forgot about that.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


End file.
